Self-esteem seems low

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Familiar Face
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Self-esteem seems low

Post by dawolf »

Hi all. I'm just feeling a bit low at the moment and pretty much know what the problem is. I've been single for the past 4 years and although it's helped me to find myself and focus on my career I really feel that I want to find love and be in a settled relationship again. I've been interested in a couple of female friends but it's never gone anywhere with them even though I tried to drop hints and show my interest, they always like me but only ever seem to view me as a 'very good friend' and nothing more. I've gone out and tried dating a few girls before but didn't work out. A couple of years back I was seeing a girl casually, she made out that she really liked me but then dropped me suddenly as she had too much going in her life apparently. I basically feel that I've had no luck recently with women. Some people seem to find partners without any trouble at all.
I have a good job, try to be confident and talk to others, make an effort to look good and dress nicely (recently bought some new trendy clothes). People often say that I'm a really nice genuine guy, intelligent and quite good looking. One of my colleagues said she was very surprised I'm single. I can't put my finger on why but most women around my age just don't seem attracted to me in a romantic sense. I wonder if they might be put off by my slightly reserved nature, not that I'm shy but I tend to enjoy the quieter and more mature activities in life rather than going out pubbing and clubbing. Also I wonder if my body size could be an issue, I'm reasonably tall (5ft 10ish) but have a very slim build meaning I'm quite lanky and probably look slimmer than most women out there!
I don't know, most people including my family say it's not likely to be about me but probably more that the right woman just hasn't come along yet. I'm 31 and feel that most aspects of my life are good but I really want some love and companionship in my life now, even just someone to show an interest and share some fun times with. Any comments or advice is appreciated. Feel like my self-esteem/confidence needs a lift.
Bel Bel
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Re: Self-esteem seems low

Post by Bel Bel »

This is probably going to sound like the same old stuff but it's becaase it works:

Join some clubs that involve you in activities you like - at least then you meet people with the same interest even if they only become frineds, they may widen your social circle and that's how you may meet someone.
Try dating again - It didn't work then but whose to say it won't now. Use a reputable site and be honest about yourself so hopefully you will attract the right sort of people.
Remember we don't always have to like the same things - Independent activities and interests are actually quite important in any relationship so you have things to talk about and don't live in each others pockets. Opposites attract sort of thing.
If all that fails just stop looking - It usually happens when we aren't expecting it and generally then you get more than one at once and have some awful decision to make. Don't worry we'll be here to help you if that happens. :P

It doesn't sound like there is anything wrong with you at all. Everyone likes different things and among my friends fellas their are fatties, lankies, spotties, baldies, shy, extrovert etc

As long as your clean and smell nice that's the main thing :wink:
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