My heart bleeds for my son

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LindaLoo
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My heart bleeds for my son

Post by LindaLoo » Mon Aug 25, 2003 2:40 pm

Hi, hope someone can help me with this problem. This is my first ever posting, so bear with me! My son is 8 and my heart is breaking because of the fact that he cannot seem to keep any friends. The whole street plays together and when I try to encourage him to join in, he just says that they hate him. A couple of them have been his "best friend" previously, but don't come round to play much, unless there is no-one else around to play with and then I feel he is being used. My daughter is 6 and she finds no trouble at all making friends, but also she seems quite happy with her own company at the same time. At school he seems quite happy, but again, best friends he has had in the past, seem to have "dumped" him and he has no special friend. I try not to make anything of this, but I am worried that this might affect his confidence in later life.

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sovs
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Post by sovs » Wed Aug 27, 2003 1:26 pm

Sounds like he's shy.
Why not join him to a hobby or scouts? Maybe swimming classes.
If your sons shy and maybe doesnt talk much then kids tend to wander off to find someone more friendly.
Try to get him to play more, and maybe take him to a activity gym to play with others.
I dont think children tend to use eachother at such a young age, i think they just go where the fun is.

Sovs :wink:

LindaLoo
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Post by LindaLoo » Thu Aug 28, 2003 8:37 pm

thanks sovs, for your reply. He is already in swimming classes and football classes and is about to get a place in cubs - he is shy, I must admit, and extremely sensitive, but he also tries so hard to please his pals all the time, so wonder if this is why they seem to "walk over the top of him". I have kind of come to the conclusion that's I get too involved and should lighten up and let him get on with things. He's the total opposite in the house though, we call him "no but" as he always has to have the last word and him and his sister fight like cat and dog from the moment they get up in the morning til they go to bed - it's driving me and their dad nuts! My throat is sore just now from having another screaming fit at them for fighting - god knows what the neighbours must think! Another thing that is niggling at me is I recently had a huge argument with my mother in law who said he had a "screw loose" and needed to see someone - all because he started to cry with frustration during a fishing trip when he couldn't catch any fish - he does seem to be a little less mature that his peers, but I don't think crying when things go wrong at age 8 is so out of the ordinary is it?

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sovs
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Post by sovs » Thu Aug 28, 2003 11:55 pm

Of course not.
I think your mother in law should keep her nose out if she has nothing nice to say.
My cousin is 8 and my son had a birthday party on monday as he was 1 and she refused to play the games we did etc and was moody. And i remember when her sister went swimming when we took her out for the day and when she found out she cryed as she wanted to go. Its just what children are like, it doesnt mean anythings wrong.
He probably just got frusrated at not being able to catch a fish, as after all that is the enjoyment of fishing.
Dont worry so much, let him spread his wings.

Sovs :wink:

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