my ex and my son

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my ex and my son

Postby brfc » Tue Dec 06, 2011 3:45 pm

My ex since we split up 3 years ago has had custody of our son. after a year and a half i had a phone call too say that my ex had tried too kill herself.

since then social services have been involved and i thought she was getting better and accepting the help that was on offer too her.

on friday i got a phone call from the police too say yet again she has tried too kill herself overdosing.

after speaking too her cousin i have found out that she has been lying too everyone and she is far from better. she even felt like she had a mad axeman chasing after her the other night. haulocinating etc.

im now in a position too have my son full time and feel its time for his safety i put in for custody of him.

hes been staying with me my partner and her family for 1 week now and i can see how much happier he is.

his school have said that too. my partner and her family love having him here and would love him too be here full time.

just thought id see what you think
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Re: my ex and my son

Postby Bel Bel » Tue Dec 06, 2011 5:23 pm

From all your previous posts you have always shown yourself to be a great caring dad.
In view of the situation I think you would definately be doing the right thing by applying for full custody. If she truely gets better you can there let her see him, supervised at first and go from there.
There is no reason why things have to stay like this and all you have to do is tell your son mummy isn't well and hopefully she will get better and he can see her again if he wants to.
Don't make any promises you can't keep and be careful not to say anything bad about his mum
Other than that I am pretty sure you will do a great job
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Re: my ex and my son

Postby highlandcow » Tue Dec 06, 2011 5:36 pm

Hi BRFC,

Sorry to hear about this situation.

I'd say it was definatley time to apply for custody. You sound like a good father, and if you're able to take your son then you should. If your ex is unstable and can't cope then it's for her good as well as your son's. Just be careful about how much he knows about what's going on; when I was 9 my mother openly admitted that she has considered suicide and you don't want to put your son through knowing something like that.

He needs a stable parent, and if he's comfortable to stay with you when there's no reason why he shouldn't.

Good luck with everything, and look after yourself too. :)
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Re: my ex and my son

Postby snail » Tue Dec 06, 2011 11:07 pm

It does sound like the best solution. Definitely go for it.
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Re: my ex and my son

Postby brfc » Tue Jul 31, 2012 8:35 am

Hi guys

just a update on this. Its still ongoing and the grandparents (my ex,s parents) want custody of him so its in the hands of the solictors and courts now. Its been one stressfull year with social workers and solicitors. i,m hoping to find out whats happening with him soon. He,s made such a bond with my wife and her parents and loves being with us. Just hope the judge see,s that and lets him stay with us permenantly.
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Re: my ex and my son

Postby Ticktock » Tue Jul 31, 2012 9:08 am

Your ex's parents obviously have more money than sense, surely it would make more sense to negotiate visiting rights with you rather than waste thousands on what is frankly a virtually unwinnable case if the previous case law is any indication! I got threatened with the same when my partner died, we don't see those grandparents anymore, what a shock...

Is your son allowed to see you ex's parents?
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Re: my ex and my son

Postby Bel Bel » Tue Jul 31, 2012 4:23 pm

Thanks for the update brfc - I had been wondering how things were going but just assumed nothing had changed.

I agree with Tick Tock they are unlikely to get custody. You are the biological parent and now your boy is settled they are unlikely to want to upset that

How is your ex at the moment?
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Re: my ex and my son

Postby brfc » Fri Aug 03, 2012 12:14 pm

Hi guys thx for your replies. I let the ex,s parents have my son overnight from fri-sun every other weekend when he,s at school and every friday after school.
I,m happy for them to have contact and his mum see,s him when he,s with them.
After all thats gone on with her mental health i wouldnt trust his mum to have him on her own.
Yeah i think more money than sense pretty much sums them up. They just want custody of my son to spite me because ive moved on and found someone else and dont want to get back with there daughter.
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Re: my ex and my son

Postby Bel Bel » Fri Aug 03, 2012 4:15 pm

Well you are being extremely generous with the visitation so yep more money than sense.
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Re: my ex and my son

Postby Cheeky monkey » Sun Mar 30, 2014 9:06 pm

That's great! Just make sure his mother still sees him and make sure she knows she's welcome cause all she needs is a will to live
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