Can't stop obsessing over toddler's safety

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Can't stop obsessing over toddler's safety

Postby ohdear » Fri Oct 28, 2011 12:00 am

I have a very well behaved toddler, but accidents happen. How can I stop panicking so much over every little thing? It's beyond normal panicking, I used to have anxiety attacks when I was younger and I'm getting the tight chest feeling quite often now. I've just seen a picture of a little boy, bless him, he slipped in a restaurant and I'm not kidding you, the fork he was holding went right through his nose. It's awful. Now I can't get it out of my head!! ](*,)
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Re: Can't stop obsessing over toddler's safety

Postby Ticktock » Fri Oct 28, 2011 11:46 pm

From your other posts it sounds like you are having a bit of a stressful time, and stress does have a habit of leaking into the things you can control in your life, which includes your toddler.

As a former male single parent watched a few too many women try and eliminate all risk from their kids lives, the reality is you can't eliminate all risk so instead you take away choice, anything which involves a risk is excluded and the child is wrapped in a nice warm safe cotton wool cocoon. So a child never learns what is safe and how to make the choices which keep themselves safe, once they escape the cocoon the results can be messy to say the least!

Most parents have at least one horror story with their child which involves blood, tears and a lot of regrets but it is all part of growing up, my daughter ran nose first into a counter while on holiday, blood everywhere and she still remembers it years later, but she also doesn't run around like a loony in strange places anymore...

Have you considered first aid training so if anything happened you could help, it would help put into perspective the helplessness which this obsession is generating in you. Toddlers are enormously resilient and with a little trust and a little teaching of common sense (after all taking the story you refer to what numpty allows any child to run around a restaurant with sharp objects...) don't need much protecting from anything.
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Re: Can't stop obsessing over toddler's safety

Postby ohdear » Sun Oct 30, 2011 12:06 pm

Thank you for your reply! It really helped!

A first aid course sounds brilliant, I never would have thought of that! Thinking about it, my daughter is quite quiet, she's very well behaved but accidents do happen.

Thanks for your reply, I'm definitely going to look into a first aid course!
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Re: Can't stop obsessing over toddler's safety

Postby ILoveChristmas » Thu Nov 03, 2011 2:52 pm

I agree completely with Ticktock.

As a parent myself I have a few horror stories as Ticktock suggests, but if I think about them they were incidents that no amount of pre-planning could have foreseen. In one incident my son decided to pull against the back of a chair and ended up on the floor with the chair on top of him and a blooded nose for good measure. What was I to do? Move all the chairs into the garage because he might pull against one? I'm sure you see my point; it just isn't possible to foresee and act on every possible danger.

What you can do is minimize the risks of things you can foresee, like attach the sticky rounded-off caps to the edges of the coffee table, put blanks into the unused plug sockets and, in the case of the child with the fork, do the sensible thing and don't let your child run around with a fork in their hand! Beyond that sort of thing, what happens happens, and the most you can do is be prepared to deal with it. First aid course is a great idea, as is a well-stocked bathroom cabinet complete with first aid kit, Calpol etc.
Christmas to a child is the first terrible proof that to travel hopefully is better than to arrive. - Stephen Fry.

The reason we struggle with insecurity is because we compare our behind-the-scenes with everyone else’s highlight reel. — Steve Furtick
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Re: Can't stop obsessing over toddler's safety

Postby ohdear » Thu Nov 03, 2011 4:54 pm

I understand what you mean, there's potential accidents everywhere! I think I might have just been a bit shaken up by that image. Most of the time when my little one had silly accidents, we laugh it off together. She's not really clumsy, she's very smart for a two year old! I'm really clumsy though, I have more accidents than she does LOL.
I've been looking into a first aid course, they don't even take long do they? I'll let you all know if I can get one one :)
Thanks for your reply! :D
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Re: Can't stop obsessing over toddler's safety

Postby Ticktock » Thu Nov 03, 2011 9:54 pm

I have trained with both St Johns and Red Cross as a youth worker and can recommend either although Red Cross do a course specifically focused around infants and children which is important as techniques for CPR and choking for example are very different between children and adults.

Here are the links to find out if one is near you...

St Johns - http://www.sja.org.uk/sja/training-cour ... -ages.aspx

Red Cross - http://www.redcrossfirstaidtraining.co. ... 4QodIjyY_A

Not always what you think it is, no surgery on the pavement or anything like that. For example our infant with the fork, a first aider would actually just be trying to keep the child calm and prevent further injury until the ambulance arrived and whisk the child to hospital, not easy admittedly.
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