4th failed IVF cycle, so sad

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spacegirl
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4th failed IVF cycle, so sad

Post by spacegirl » Tue Jun 25, 2019 7:32 pm

Hello everyone,

I dip in and out here and I'm sorry because I should be more present for everyone else on this board who have been so supportive over the years.

I got the results of my fourth IVF cycle on Friday, a straight-forward "negative I'm afraid", and I'm just broken.
I just feel so sad and so exhausted by it all. Don't quite know what advice I'm asking, but I just feel sh*t.

I've had a few miscarriages as well and I just don't know what to do next :(
not if you were the last dandy on earth

reckoner
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Re: 4th failed IVF cycle, so sad

Post by reckoner » Tue Jul 02, 2019 1:27 pm

Hi spacegirl,

I'm so sorry to read this. Friends of mine are in the middle of their first IVF attempt so I'm learning what this involves - the physical and emotional investment required. I can only imagine how devastating it must be for you and your partner for a fourth attempt to end in failure. I read your earlier post about miscarriage too and wish I could give you a huge hug and say something helpful or comforting for you.

What do you think about trying again? How is your husband handling it? Have you got good support to help you through this?

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peecee
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Re: 4th failed IVF cycle, so sad

Post by peecee » Tue Jul 02, 2019 10:43 pm

Hi, Spacegirl.

Don’t worry about other PPers at the moment, most people are dipping in and out too, it’s much quieter than it used to be. Let's just think about you for now.

I read your post, but all I could think of to say was “I’m so sorry”.

I never had children, but my sister got pregnant eventually through IVF, then miscarried three months in. Our mum died suddenly shortly afterwards, and our dad became such a problem that my sister and b-i-l couldn’t cope with the additional stress of another round of IVF (yes, it is stressful). I think you are amazingly courageous to keep on with it.

Just being nosy, but did you ever get the polyps sorted out? I had a friend I lost touch with over the years, but before she moved away she was told she had polyps too, and wouldn’t be able to have children. Years later, I hear that she has two children, but I don’t know what sort of medical procedures she went through. So I won’t tell you “there’s always hope”, because that’s a bit pointless and insulting when you’re going through so much pain and not feeling particularly hopeful right now.

Of course you’ve thought about adoption and fostering, are they completely off the table?

But mainly – as Reckoner asked, are you getting support and comfort from your friends and family, and how is your husband coping? Please be gentle with yourselves, both of you.

Lots of love and a virtual hug from all of us. x
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