Manipulative Parents

For problems with parents, whatever your age...
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snowball1
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Manipulative Parents

Post by snowball1 » Sat Nov 07, 2009 8:30 am

Hi
I'm 43 and have lived with manipulative parents all the time. I have a sister who basically doesn't acknowledge that I exist as I am the black sheep. I am still trying to recover from an abusive marriage and have never been able to talk to my family. They don't even know I was abused. I am not working currently due to heart disease but rely on my parents financially. I will not be able to go back to full time work anyway more than likely. My parents are manipulative, especially my mother. My father has only just started actually acknowledging and having conversations with me since I started an OU degree in 2006. My mother knows exactly how to manipulate me but I don't think they realise how hurt I get. I have been thinking of moving away, maybe working abroad but you need money to do that. I don't know what to do. It is getting serious, my feelings are so bad.

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dipsydoodlenoodle
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Re: Manipulative Parents

Post by dipsydoodlenoodle » Mon Nov 09, 2009 10:36 am

See about speaking to a counsillor about your abusive marriage and your family life.

What about getting a part time job - supermarkets would be good for this.

You need to set smaller goals,

i.e. get a part time job, speak to counsillor, contact friends rather than having one goal of moving abroad; have it as your ultimate goal but set smaller ones on the way to getting there.
A hug is a great gift, one size fits all.

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Bel Bel
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Re: Manipulative Parents

Post by Bel Bel » Mon Nov 09, 2009 12:29 pm

It what way are they manupulative? What are theyy trying to get from you?
Have you been to the council to try and get a place of your own even if you have to go into temporary accomodation first
Tell your doctor the home enviroment is causing you stress, this can't be good for the heart condition and hopefully they will help you wiht the council and getting a place.
why do you need to rely on your family finacially, don't you get benefits if you are genuially unable to work. Perhaps you need to look into what you are entitled to
Also if you have never told anyone about the abuse then they couldn't understand what you have been through. Do you feel you can't tell your parents?
If you are still scared from the abuse I agree with dipsy that counselling would be a good idea
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