Why don't they trust me?

For problems with parents, whatever your age...
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PurePurple
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Why don't they trust me?

Post by PurePurple » Mon Apr 09, 2007 3:23 pm

Hmm Ok. I'm having a few problems with my parents at the moment, as you've probably guessed, In the way of trust :o

For starters, My dad doesn't trust me to take a 2 minute walk, down to the shops on my own, without my mobile and doorkey, He's always telling me to take care - Which isn't exactly a bad thing but it can get annoying.

When i'm going out with my friends or on my own down the town, He's ALWAYS saying be careful, have my mobile on, Call us if there's a problem or anything like that.

If I go out on a night, He tells me to have my mobile, doorkey and always be careful, don't talk to strangers. He's telling me the basic stuff I already know, I learnt it in primary school.

My mum isn't really that bothered - I don't mean like, if I got kidnapped she wouldn't be bothered because the chances are she would be, but she knows I always have my doorkey, mobile and she knows I know how to take care of myself and I know the basic rules of the road etc.

Does anyone know of any ways in which I can comfort my dad or make him notice I am trustworthy?

I know it will be hard but that is a risk i'm willing to take. I feel really bad when I have a go at my dad because I know these things, and I think it makes him feel bad - But he likes to know that i'm safe, And I just want him to see that I am trustworthy and capable of doing things myself, and going to places myself.

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Post by kitten » Mon Apr 09, 2007 5:37 pm

I wouldn't worry too much Purple, Dad's are very protective of their daughters.

I moved out along time ago and am now 25 but when I go and visit or stay over if I'm going out with my sister he still says "Be careful" or "look after yourself" its just their way of being protective. :D

Your Dad obviously loves you very much.

P.S. If I'm staying over I still get asked if I have my key to get back in!

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Post by PurePurple » Mon Apr 09, 2007 6:05 pm

Lol thankyou kitten, I'm seeing it from a different point of view now :D

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Post by all_apologies » Mon Apr 09, 2007 8:44 pm

Try not to see it as annoying, I actually think it's really sweet.

To be honest, to some degree he'll always worry, whether you're 14 or 40! That's what parents do, and they're only looking out for you. The only way you can get him to relax a bit is to continue to be responsible. After a while (whether it be a few months or years!) he'll learn that you've never got into any trouble and are sensible, so will probably chill out a little. But seriously, don't take it as a sign of distrust - dads will worry regardless of your age or how sensible you are.

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Post by gatekeeper » Tue Apr 10, 2007 3:33 am

Hi Purple, I'm turning 19 in less than a month. My parents, mom mainly still worry if I've had my meals.

They're prob worried because everytime we flip the papers or turn on the TV, we see news of teenagers running away, kidnapped, raped or even killed. As a parent, it's only natural that they go, "oh that girl's my daughter's age, would it be safe for her to roam around now, do you think that pervert would target her?"

You could tell him things like, "Dad, I'm going to the store now, have my mobile with me so don't worry k?" before he can remind you.
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Post by PurePurple » Tue Apr 10, 2007 8:44 am

Well i'm 15 now, And I sometimes have to get the bus after school and he's always like, have you got your doorkey etc.. and i'm like Yes dad..He knows I rarely forget it :o

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Post by chat noir » Fri Apr 20, 2007 6:36 pm

I always tell my mum I have my mobile on me and leave the number for it or the house number of the house if Im staying with a friend by the phone if Im going out - Im 22 this year but I still hate the thought of my parents worrying about me!

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Post by muppet13 » Tue May 08, 2007 7:38 pm

Nearly 28 and still have to report home every time I'm driving somewhere. My dad still calls me littlin always has and always will. Imagine been called littlin at 28yrs, 5'9" and xxst?!

I'm afraid it may never change, it shows they care - annoying I know. Have you had the 'One day you'll have kids of your own then you'll understand' line? Had that a few times to.

Parents want you to learn from their successes and their mistakes, we wanna find out for ourselves. I guess its they way it'll always be, even when you have kids of your own!
Inside me theres a skinny girl shouting, but I usually shut her up with chocolate

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Post by spacegirl » Sun May 20, 2007 12:12 am

parents will always worry! i don't know if anyone's ever found this, but i've been living out of my house for years, so obviously i can do whatever i want, come home whenever i want, or stay out all night if i want. and obviously my mum doesn't stay awake every night wondering if i'm safely tucked up in bed. but if i ever stay in my mum's, at christmas etc., if i go out with my friends, she stays half awake all night to make sure i got in ok!!
that's just the way parents are made unfortunately haha... it is annoying i know, but it's not that your dad doesn't trust you that he's always reminding you to take your phone and key, it's just for his own reassurance so he knows you can contact them
not if you were the last dandy on earth

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