Over reacting?

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Over reacting?

Postby therose » Wed Aug 31, 2011 1:21 pm

Now I may be over reacting and I would like somebody's opinion who doesnt know me or my family and wondered if I could have your imput?

I got engaged in May 2010 and my fiance and I had booked our wedding for May 2012, the reason for the delay in this is our parents arent in a position to help financially so we have had to save for the full amount. Obviously this is our choice and we could have had something smaller and cheaper and get married sooner.

My brother then proposed to his girlfriend after borrowing money to buy her engagement ring.. which i still havent had back. They have decided that they are going to get married a month after us, in the venue I wanted (but couldnt afford) because his fiancees parents are paying for the whole thing. I have expressed that I am upset about this but he has said that I am over reacting about the whole situation and that I am jealous, am I or am I justified in asking them not to have the venue and not to steal my thunder??

Thanks in advance
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Re: Over reacting?

Postby ILoveChristmas » Wed Aug 31, 2011 2:19 pm

I can see why you're upset about it, but it's not your place to try and prevent them from being married in the place that you wanted.

If it was the other way round and you'd been introduced to a venue that you thought was perfect but that your brother couldn't afford, would you accept him telling you that shouldn't get married there? I think you'd probably find it quite petty, albeit for understandable reasons.

This is a situation where you need to rise above these kinds of feelings. They're not doing anyone any good and are only creating ill-feeling between you, your brother and your sister-in-law to be. Where does it end? Do you go to the wedding with a sour face; do you refuse to go at all, or do you accept that your brother is fortunate enough to use the place and look forward to his big day?

You're getting married before him, so he's not stealing your thunder. If anything, people will be more focused on your big day than his and all the arrangements that yours will require help with.
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Re: Over reacting?

Postby snail » Wed Aug 31, 2011 3:02 pm

As above. I can see how galling this must be for you, but it's not really any of your business what your brother does for his wedding. When I was reading your post, I thought you were going to say that your parents had agreed to pay for his wedding and not yours - I could understand that you would be very annoyed in that case, but in fact your brother has just struck lucky with his fiancee's parents. Try to be happy for him - I'm sure you love him, and it must be better that he has the day he wants.
These mountains that you are carrying, you were only supposed to climb.

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Re: Over reacting?

Postby Bel Bel » Thu Sep 01, 2011 3:32 pm

Agree with others and remember it isn't about who has the best venue or best cake or most guests it's supposed to be about you showing your love and uniting as a couple
You will spoil your own day if you feel your day isn't special just because they have a better venue
Life is for living so live it to the fullest

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