Brother is a bully

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Brother is a bully

Postby Carrie29 » Mon Mar 02, 2009 7:17 pm

My 30 year old brother treats my Mum horribly. Despite living with her rent free he is abusive and scares her with his temper particularly when he has been drinking. He cannot seem to take responsibility for anything in his life and blames her or occasionally his girlfriend for everything that goes wrong He has had a run of bad luck recently including losing the house he was buying, his job and being banned by his ex from seeing his daughter. He outwardly resents Mum as she is allowed contact with the child. She would like him to move out but he refuses to until he can afford his own property.

We have always had a good relationship and he is lovely with my husband and son. He can be nice at times and during these periods my Mother forgives him and appears to forget how awful he has been.

I have helped and supported him as much as I can throughout his problems but feel by continuing to do this I am condoning his awful behaviour. I feel my only option is to cut ties with him as am getting nowhere by asking him not to treat my Mum this way. However, I fear if I did it would be her that would pay. We lost our Father in our early twenties and he took this very badly.
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Re: Brother is a bully

Postby Bel Bel » Tue Mar 03, 2009 12:43 pm

I would suggest she goes to the citizens advice for help getting him out, following the law
I know it's not nice but she can't feel a prisoner in her own home and it's his own behaviour that is causing her to want him out, if he was behaving she probably wouldn't have a problem
He is old enough to stand on his own two feet and he is no longer your mums responsibility
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Postby morris mouse » Tue Mar 03, 2009 6:09 pm

Carrie29 wrote: He has had a run of bad luck recently including losing the house he was buying, his job and being banned by his ex from seeing his daughter. He outwardly resents Mum as she is allowed contact with the child.


No,it's NOT a run of bad luck. These incidents are happening in his life as a result of bad behaviour

He sees his Mum as "an object" to which he can project such bad behaviour.


I would suggest she goes to the citizens advice for help getting him out.


I agree.
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