worried about housemate's suspicious activity

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worried about housemate's suspicious activity

Postby Beth.Penguin » Wed Aug 08, 2012 11:22 pm

I'm sorry in advance for the essay but this is a dangerous subject so there are details I've going to have to leave out and I cant mention names. I hope this isnt too confusing.

So I've moved into a student house and everything was cool and dandy with everyone. We had a couple of teething problems but the problem I'm here to talk about is a friend I'll call Guy A. Now I've know Guy A for almost a year now and we've been good friends, we've gone on nights out together and had a laugh and hes crashed on my floor a few times. Guy A has a lovely Girlfriend who we'll call Girl A. We all like her and get a long and its all good.

Heres the start of the issue; We start suspecting that Guy A is cheating on Girl A, he brings girls back and we hear alsorts of noises coming from his room. None of our (me and the rest of the housemates) business, we have a giggle about it and move on. Then one of these girls happens to be a friend of my house mate; Girl B. Girl B tells us that this friend of hers is now terrified of Guy A. A bit worrying. None of our business though, we move on.

Then we find out that all of the above is true the same week that another of the housemates finds loads and loads of naked pictures of girls on Guy A's computer along with a bit of evidence that he might have been uploading these images to porn websites. We found this

Then things get worse when Girl B tells us that Guy A had sexually assaulted her as well as acusations that Guy A was stealing her underwear from the washing line. This makes us all very concerned for all these girls wellbeings along with mine and another potential housemate.

My issue is that Guy A could be dangerous and my Boyfriend who is moving in next month is scared of me being alone with him and I'm scared that he might target me. I also feel strongly worried for Girl A and whether she knows what her boyfriend is up to. The worst part is that Girl B told one housemate (Guy C) this (not me) and despite her pleading to keep it a secret, it has got out between the housemates. Guy A doesnt know we all know about it and it feels like confronting him would break the trust that Girl B had with Guy C. Although I still feel hes my friend, I think that what hes done is disgusting and I want him to know that and be punished for it.

I dont feel safe in my own house and I dont know what to do.

Any advice would be amazing.

thank you in advance.
Beth.Penguin
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Re: worried about housemate's suspicious activity

Postby Bel Bel » Fri Aug 10, 2012 4:17 pm

If you can prove he is uploading images to porn sites report him to the police. You could do it anoymously if you are scared. However you say he might be. If girls consent to having their pics taken he is not commiting a crime but uploading them to porn sites without their consent is.

Why has the girl who was sexually assaulted not gone to the police? Do you think she is definately telling the truth or has she been shunned by guy A as he wants to stay with girl A. Some people do make up stories to get back at people, she may have told guy C knowing he would tell all you guys.

You need to be sure of your FACTS not just listen to gossip and second hand information.

Having pics of naked girls on your computer is not a crime so be carful you are not getting dragged into some girls payback on guy A
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Re: worried about housemate's suspicious activity

Postby Beth.Penguin » Fri Aug 10, 2012 9:57 pm

This is it, its proving it. I kind of feel like its none of my business, well, I did until this got out about the girl who he harmed. The reason she hasnt told anyone is because her boyfriend is in a band with Guy A and I think shes worried that it'll ruin 2 relationships and this band.

To be honest, if shes telling the truth, I honestly don't understand how shes managed to carry on living in the house as if nothings happened. As far as she knows, I dont know about it and neither do the other members of the house that Guy C has told and he says that he was sworn to secrecy over it. This girl has moved out of the house as well as her boyfriend in the last 2 months.

My suggestion to the others was that we keep an eye on him and if we catch him doing any of this stuff (he seems to be really clumsy with it all. Hes introduced us to a few of the girls hes been sleeping with) then maybe we can encourage either his girlfriend or one of these girls to do something about it. My housemates seem worried but not inclined to do anything about any of this.

I know I wont be able to be alone in the same room as Guy A anymore without feeling awkward and a little bit scared which is sad because I thought I could trust him and feel relaxed around him. While all of this has been playing out, hes been lying about stuff a lot and having guests around late at night more than usual.

Thanks for your help.
Beth.Penguin
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