took a loan behind my back

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reckoner
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Re: took a loan behind my back

Post by reckoner » Sat Jun 02, 2018 2:13 pm

Hi pebba,

We are aware that you and lena12 are the same person, along with several other IDs you have used to post with over a period of nearly 10 years (and been warned about several times).

Although this is against the forum rules, we are very concerned about you and your well-being, which is why we have moved your post here, so that other members can understand as much of the situation as possible.

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Tarantula
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Re: took a loan behind my back

Post by Tarantula » Sat Jun 02, 2018 2:52 pm

Hi pebba/lena12

I think it would be a good idea for you to speak to a professional therapist or counsellor about all of this, to hopefully get some clarity about what you're going to do next. You need to do this for yourself; not for your husband. For you.

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Re: took a loan behind my back

Post by pebba » Sat Jun 02, 2018 7:31 pm

Then do me the biggest favour and delete my topic. I think the moderators need help and need to see a counsellor. Now DELETE TOPIC ASAP unless your to thick to understand what I'm saying

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peecee
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Re: took a loan behind my back

Post by peecee » Sun Jun 03, 2018 10:09 am

Dear Pebba

If you remember, you requested us to delete your last thread, and told us you would not be returning to PP. We did delete your thread for you, while you continued to post under another of your names.

You then decided to post your original problem under the name of Pebba again, and Reckoner was quite right to remind you of the PP rules. However, she was also quite right when she said that everybody here wants the best for you. There really is no need for you to be rude (yet again) to any of us at PP – we have only ever tried to help you.

We won’t be deleting this thread, because you will want to post in it again in future.

We wish you the best and very much hope you find the help you need.

peecee, Reckoner and Snail
Shine your light and let the whole world see.

pebba
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Re: took a loan behind my back

Post by pebba » Sun Jun 03, 2018 2:14 pm

Well if your that sad you have to keep my topic here because how many really come to this site with problems, NOT Many so no wonder you want to keep mine lol. So go away and just delete it for Pete's sake I would never return to this rubbish site ever ever again and you all don't know anything just a bunch of bad people. You all need help

Edited for swearing

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Tarantula
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Re: took a loan behind my back

Post by Tarantula » Mon Jun 04, 2018 10:09 am

Hi pebba, I hope your situation improves. Whether or not it does is entirely down to you. Instead of getting angry, you might consider that all of your beliefs/attitudes/ decisions have led you to this point, and at this point, you are not happy in your life. Therefore something needs to change. You need to change.

So I hope you do, for your own sake and for your family too. Good luck finding the support you need. All the best. xx

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truth ot not

Post by lama » Tue Jul 23, 2019 5:04 pm

My husband went to the stop to put the lottery on. he said the female sales assistant said to him to share his winnings with her if he won. he said he told her, if £10 is worth sharing then I will. I asked how old she was and he said between 30 to 40. he is 52. I wonder why he had to tell me what happened and his answer was that it was just a joke. he as been going to this shop quite a lot lately even thou he can go to a smaller one by us but he said he did not want to because our last landlord lives where the smaller shop is and he does not want to see her. she did not do any jobs on the house where we lived and I do not want to see her either but it does not stop me from going to the smaller shop. I told him that she could still go to the bigger shop even if she as the smaller one is closer to her and he could bump into her there. I think this is a excuse from him to go to the bigger one and I think he as been going more to see if he can see this sales assistant and I don't know if he hides his wedding ring or not from her but I think he likes it and maybe she was flirting with him. he said, do you really think I would share any money with this tart if I won some. he as stared at women when I have been out with him and not cared about my feelings and what it did to me. he as no respect and I am sick of it that im even considering divorcing him. on holiday a month ago he was even staring at a woman across the way from us who was sitting on a table next to a male and another couple. he said he was looking at the food they were eating because they were eating something fancy but he had a bit of a smile on his face and I saw her looking over. he ruined the holiday because I knew he was looking at her. he done it when we ate out and some women where dancing around with a sex toy on the floor and he kepted looking over and laughing. I said he could of looked away but he said everyone else where looking at them and I said he didn't have to be one of them. should I get him out of my life once and for all. is he going to the shop more to see this woman. I think he sees me as a pushover and as no respect whatsoever and ive had enough.

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Re: took a loan behind my back

Post by lama » Fri Jul 26, 2019 10:52 am

Any replies at all to this

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hut and shocked

Post by Menta » Tue Feb 04, 2020 6:25 pm

Met my husband on a dating site 24 years ago. back then it wasn't as popular as it is today so I felt ashamed I had to go down that path to meet someone but I never seemed to meet nice guys at clubs. I thought he had met his ex girlfriends at night clubs now he tells me that he met them the same way as me. I am shocked because I am convinced he as always told me he met them at clubs and I was the only one he met by going on a dating site. he said he told me how he met them but he never said it was that way and he made me feel I was a failure by meeting him on the site when all along he had met the others that way. I used to say to him that even thou he met me on a dating site at least our relationship lasted longer then it did with them. he used to say to me, the way we met, like it was really really bad. did he tell me lies because he felt ashamed how he met them incase I might of thought bad of him because he did not meet them at clubs like I thought he had. he said he could never attract a girl at clubs because of the way he looks, he is just a plain looking guy and had to go on dating sites. im really hurt because he lied to me. also one of his exs I met when I was young. my sister as a friend and this friend lived with her sister who was my husbands ex. i used to go to there house with my sister and I cannot believe my husband went with her and I met her. im not sure if I ever told him that I met her but the thought of them two together is hurting me even thou this was a year before I met him. why did it had to be me that this happened to, why did I meet a man who went with a woman I met years ago. she lived in the same town as me as well. he told me when we had been arguing about all of this what site he had met this girl on and her name also where the other exs lived liked I really wanted to know something like that. why would he still remember after all these years later when he wasn't with them very long. do you think he still thinks about them. I don't remember my exs much so why does he.

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looking at anothe woman

Post by fila » Tue Feb 04, 2020 7:05 pm

Went away for a weekend with my husband. ive been suffering with a bad leg so thought having a swim might help it. we decided to go on the weekend and its the same baths we have been to in the past. it was quite busy with all the kids but could we still manage to have a little swim. there was a woman who seemed to be near us a few times with her son and my husband had his arms on the wall just resting them and facing outwards. the woman came by with her son and he got out of the water by the wall where my husband was. I saw my husband looking at her and she had make up still on and her hair up. I did not look at her to see if she was looking at my husband but he did not move so he was facing her and still kepted his arms up and did not move. if that was me I would of turned away so I would not be looking out at someone who was so close by but I think my husband might of liked doing it and found her attractive. when she moved away I saw him looking around in the pool and it was like he was looking to see where she was. I asked if she was a ex or he knew her but said he didn't. he denied he was looking for her. he got out of the pool and I stayed in upset because I had had a nice time up until this woman appeared. he said where is he supposed to put his eyes, but he does not have to keep looking in the same direction at someone does he.you think he had never seen a woman before the way he looks sometimes, like he as been on a desert island and not saw flesh for years. he said when will I stop accusing him of doing stuff he isn't and he did not want to go swimming anyway but done it because of my leg and I do things for him when I don't want to so that's why he went with me. I thought he really wanted to go and also I was thinking it would be nice to have a swim and a little fun in the pool together now I know he lied by saying he wanted to go when he didn't. he as looked at a woman on holiday by looking across when she was with another man and he said he was looking at the food they ordered but he had kepted looking for ages. I wondered if he had fancied her. I saw the woman look across and my husband had a little smile on his face but said he said he did not know her and was only looking at the food. why does he do this to me. when I see a nice looking man I don't keep looking at him especially if he is with someone and because I am with m husband I would not keep looking at them. I think he as no respect for me but he says he does and he is not doing these things and its all made up in my head. he as looked at porn for years so as this got anything to do with how he sees woman do you think.

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Re: took a loan behind my back

Post by Dave777 » Sat Feb 08, 2020 8:52 am

Fila
A lot of men have an eye for a pretty girl, including myself and we try not to get caught by our partner, that’s just the way men are. Usually the girl turns away and it ends there, if she smiles back she is enjoying the attention, maybe she is single, maybe not, if they had met before they would have exchanged a few words or had a chat. I would say don’t make an issue out of this it probably means nothing, do you really want to escalate this into a real problem, where you sour the relationship because he looked at another woman.
When I go to the pool there are a few women that are regulars, some I just acknowledge with a smile some a few words of chat, it means nothing in the romantic sense, it’s just being friendly.

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Re: took a loan behind my back

Post by Dave777 » Sat Feb 08, 2020 9:27 am

Menta
Why are you worrying about what was said over 20 yrs ago he must be a good man he has stayed with you, why does it matter how you met after all these years. Only a minority of men are extroverts that attract girls in a club, most of them are not good long term prospects, I guess he really wished he was more sociable in that way. If the arguments continue your relationship will break down, why?.

Lies. There are all sorts of “ lies” are you guilty of any ?.
By omission, not revealing a secret you know would be bad
Agreeing, because its what someone wants to hear
A half truth with an ulterior motive
Lastly a bare faced lie

We all do it, if you don’t you are truly a saint

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out to please him

Post by gelam » Wed Nov 18, 2020 1:41 pm

Warning - this post contains graphic content (reckoner)

Hello, I need advise about my relationship.
I have been with my husband 28 years and he had his prostrate removed 4 years ago. we still have sex at least 3 or 4 times a week and I dress up and give him oral but not all the time. he gives me oral now and then when I give him it but I dont think he likes to. he hardly says he wants to give me oral and he hardly touches me down there. I always feel I have to dress up or give him oral to please him even thou I don't think he worries about pleasing me and its more about what he can get.
He says I don't have to dress up and he finds me sexy with or without putting it on but its nice when im wearing it. I Usually put it on when he is in the bathroom and when he comes in and I don't wear it he seems to have a look on his face as if he is expecting me to be even thou he never says for me to put it on. I put it on about twice a week .
Its like im always out to please him in bed. maybe its also because he as looked at porn sites for years and once told me he was fascinated by one of the porn stars bodies which hurt me deeply to know he got turned on by another womans body when he was with me. he says it was just the sex but why did he have to look at that when he was having sex with me. he says he does not look at it now but I think he does like when I go out of the house. he told me this is what he done last time when I was out so its always there at the back of my mind whenever I leave him alone and he says he is working on his laptop but I wonder what else he is doing too.
You would think after having his prostate removed he would be worried I might go off with another man because my husband cannot have sex how we used to but he doesn't. Im the one always worried he will cheat or as cheated which he denies he ever as.
He once told me one of his exs gave him oral in the car and im not sure if he said he was driving at the time when she done this and we have had sex in the car and im sure oral too( its been years since we lasted did) and I feel I must do that to him because she did and I don't want him thinking I only do it in bed and to show im not boring to not to it anywhere else. why do I feel like this and out to please him after all these years.
Last edited by reckoner on Thu Nov 19, 2020 12:57 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Reason: Warning for graphic content

gelam
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Re: took a loan behind my back

Post by gelam » Mon Nov 23, 2020 5:16 pm

Any answers please

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