Dating again

For problems with girlfriends, boyfriends, husbands, wives, lovers and leavers!
Forum rules
NEW USERS HAVE TO WAIT FOR THEIR FIRST POSTS TO BE APPROVED BY AN ADMINISTRATOR. Rules | Essential Information | FAQ | Support | Twitter
Post Reply
Mrconfused74
Familiar Face
Familiar Face
Posts: 264
Joined: Tue Apr 28, 2015 11:24 pm
Gender: Male

Dating again

Post by Mrconfused74 » Fri May 31, 2019 8:03 pm

Not sure if this should be in another forum but here goes.
So after being separated for almost a year I figured it was time to get back in the dating game, but my question is this, is it ok to speak to more than one woman about dating? Of course depending on how you meet it’s necessary to talk to get to know someone, perhaps meet for a coffee or dinner a few times. At my age Having been married is it unreasonable to see more than one person before seeing how things progress? Yes I’d understand if a woman I was seeing wanted to do the same thing, I mean if you do online dating it’s likely you will talk to more than one person, so should you stop when you’ve met? When you’ve kissed? Or if you feel it has potential??

reckoner
Site Admin
Site Admin
Posts: 747
Joined: Thu Sep 04, 2008 11:20 am

Re: Dating again

Post by reckoner » Wed Jun 05, 2019 2:43 pm

I have to say, first of all, that I don't have any dating experience as such and am not familiar with any established dating etiquette that there may be, so I'm just going on what seems right to me.
Mrconfused74 wrote:
Fri May 31, 2019 8:03 pm
is it ok to speak to more than one woman about dating?
Do you mean 'while dating'? If so, yes, I would say that's absolutely OK. If you went to a bar or a club or a pub, it would be OK to talk to more than one woman so I think the same principle should apply. (If you did mean 'about dating', unless I've misunderstood, I'd think you can talk to whoever you like about it).

I can imagine that people on the dating scene are generally keeping their options open so I think if you meet someone you feel potential with or want to keep seeing, the conversation is also about what their answers to these questions are. The thing with dating is that you're both strangers to each other and there's no real reason to demonstrate loyalty or make a commitment to a stranger. When you stop becoming strangers to each other will be between the two of you.

In my view, you're a free agent until you promise otherwise to someone. As you're sensitive enough to ask these questions in the first place, I think you can trust yourself to do the right thing by the woman should things get serious enough for the question of fidelity to arise. Honestly, I'm not sure when that is but I'd say the safe benchmark for knowing when to discuss it with her is the point at which you would prefer her to not see other people.

Dave777
Just Landed
Just Landed
Posts: 1
Joined: Fri Jun 07, 2019 8:04 am

Re: Dating again

Post by Dave777 » Fri Jun 07, 2019 1:46 pm

Hi I’m in much the same situation after a long time away from the dating game. I did try online dating and likely matches did want to meet fairly quickly, if the chemistry was there and we met again I didn’t meet any others, it seemed to me better to get to know one lady at a time. What I did find was that they all had been looking for a man for a long time, in one case 23 yrs.

In my case the online dates did not prove fruitful there were just too many family, work, or social conflicts to get a relationship going, since then I asked a work contact for a coffee, and after a few weeks it all looks very promising.

Post Reply