Teenager confused over sexualty

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Teenager confused over sexualty

Postby Hetty » Tue Jul 01, 2014 9:09 am

My 15 year old daughter asked to chat with me last night. She told me that even though she has a boyfriend and likes boys, for some time she has also found herself to be sexually attracted to girls.

I asked her if there was one girl in particular she felt this way about, or if it was girls in general and I also asked her if she 'liked' them in the same way as she 'liked' boys or if she was just attracted to them because they were pretty, fluffy, cute etc. She said that it was in the same way as she fancied boys.

I told her that maybe it was just a teenage crush thing, or maybe that she was bisexual and that as she got older and more confident in herself and her relationships that whether she was bi or straight would become more clear to her and that she should just go with her feelings and the flow.

I have no issues with her potentially being Bi and I told her that as long as she was happy and healthy and whatever partners she had in life treated her with love and respect (and that she gives those things back) I do not care if they are male or female and that she was important to me, not her sexual orientation.

So, hoping that I have told her the right things I want to ensure that if she comes back and wants to talk more about the subject that I have resources available to share with her. Do any of you have any details of support groups, website etc that she could visit if she wants to?

Thank you x
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Re: Teenager confused over sexualty

Postby all_apologies » Thu Jul 03, 2014 7:25 pm

You've done the right thing in your approach with your daughter, and you should also feel pleased that, at 15, she feels comfortable enough to be open about it with you. By the age of 17 (just a little older than your daughter), my main outlet to vent about my sexuality was this very website. She may well find it, or forums dedicated specifically to LGBT people, just as helpful. Chatting with others who have faced similar issues, whilst being able to hide behind a veil of internet anonymity, was very liberating for me while I was figuring myself out.

I joined the local university's LGBT society a couple of years back out of interest. I had a laugh and made some good friends, but by this point I was 26, in a long term relationship, and fully comfortable with my own sexuality. My only regret is that I did not join the society when I went to do my undergraduate degree at 18. I think it would have helped me to acquaint myself with some LGBT people and not feel so isolated as the only gay person in my group of friends in my late teens. This could be an avenue your daughter could go down. Whether she goes to uni or not, most uni-based LGBTs are happy to welcome people of all ages, student or not.
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