Should I tell my father I'm on anti depressants?

[sean83]

I've suffered from depression for many years, started when I was a teenager, got worse when my mother died at 18, I've seriously considered suicide in the past, I'm pretty past that now, I moved to Australia in 2009, about a year later I decided to finally do something about my depression, I went to the doctor and was prescribed anti depressants, and have been taking them for the last two years.

My father worries about me, however, I have not told anyone in my family that I take meds, maybe its to do with pride, I also don't like the thought of everyone talking about me being on meds and making thing about it.

I don't want to cause more worry either, should I tell my father that I've been on anti depressants?

[Weasley]

Hi there,

Really and truly - it's completely up to you. I went through a very difficult time in my life around 4 years ago when I was with an abusive boyfriend (mentally and phsycially) which resulted in me becoming depressed. I was diagnosed with depression and anxiety around 18 months ago and have been taking pills ever since. To start with, I was dead against telling my parents - I mean, it's my life, why should they know that I'm on meds? Plus, like you, I felt embarrassed - when I was much younger I always thought people on anti depressants were attention seekers (yeah I know, how bad of me!) and thought people would think the same of me, plus I held a LOT of detail about what happened to me during the time with my ex that my parents would have probably questioned why I was taking these meds. In the end, after speaking to a good friend who's mom and brother BOTH suffer from depression, I decided to tell them. He made me realise that depression is NOTHING to do with you - when you are depressed and don't feel like getting out of bed, or don't feel like talking or are ripping peoples heads off if they say just the slightest little thing- that's not the normal you, that's the depression. People do understand and it's nothing to be ashamed of, and people that care for you only want the best, and I'm sure that's how your dad will feel too. I told my parents and although they were a bit like "whoa, where did that come from", they completely understood, so now if I do ever "get a bit angry" or tell them I don't feel like going out tonight etc, they understand, and that's easier than having to come up with excuses.

Sorry for the essay, but depression is something I unfortunately only know too well. But at the end of the day, whether you tell your dad is your call - I just wanted to tell you about how I handled it and how it turned out.

Good luck either way x

[highlandcow]

Hi Sean

I too have had experience of anti-depressants, having been on courses of them since I was 19 or so. I was wary about telling my parents (I was worried they'd blame themselves, as some of it was the delayed fallout from their divorce). But I thought, if it was my child, I'd hope they'd tell me.

My Dad doesn't believe in depression. While he is a lovely, caring man (and a scientist to boot) he simply doesn't believe in it. But when I told him, we both realised, that whatever happens, I'm still his child and what I go through, he goes through to a certain extent. And then when my brother was diagnosed with not only depression and anxiety but chronic fatigue syndrome, he was supportive then too.

Depression is a long road and it can be very tough to go down it alone. At the end of the day he's your Dad and only you are really going to know how he will react, but you're still his child, I'm sure that he'll want to do what he can to help. There are lots of websites and information on depression these days. Could you send him some of these? It's also estimated that 1 in 4 suffer with depression at some point in our lives, myself included, so maybe it will help to know you're not alone.

[emma83]

Openness can be beneficial to you in the short and long term.
Without people speaking out about depression it will not raise awareness.
People see it as a stigma but its nothing to be ashamed of, just because you can't see it doesn't make it any less of an illness.
Support is a massive part of dealing with depression as it isolates that lonely feeling people have.
Can I ask if you have tried any other therapies.
Emma.


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