Search found 943 matches

by Tarantula
Thu Jun 21, 2018 6:27 pm
Forum: Girlfriends & Boyfriends - Husbands & Wives
Topic: Advice re marriage to controlling partner.
Replies: 45
Views: 5109

Re: Advice re marriage to controlling partner.

I can only agree with what the others have said, especially boulding. Aspergers is not an excuse (for her). Bereavement is not an excuse. Being female is not an excuse (imagine if the genders were reversed and a man was treating a woman this way... there'd be uproar! But there's no moral difference ...
by Tarantula
Wed Jun 20, 2018 10:35 am
Forum: Girlfriends & Boyfriends - Husbands & Wives
Topic: Advice re marriage to controlling partner.
Replies: 45
Views: 5109

Re: Advice re marriage to controlling partner.

ONE MORE THING

She is totally going to use her father's passing to make you feel guilty.

Don't fall for it.
by Tarantula
Wed Jun 20, 2018 10:33 am
Forum: Girlfriends & Boyfriends - Husbands & Wives
Topic: Advice re marriage to controlling partner.
Replies: 45
Views: 5109

Re: Advice re marriage to controlling partner.

Okay, I want you to put the kettle on, sit back and carefully read back through everything you wrote. Seriously, do it. Not to sound like your gf or anything, but I'm even telling you what to do! Done? Okay. Now tell me, what would you say if your best friend was in this situation? How about your si...
by Tarantula
Mon Jun 04, 2018 10:09 am
Forum: Girlfriends & Boyfriends - Husbands & Wives
Topic: took a loan behind my back
Replies: 56
Views: 9013

Re: took a loan behind my back

Hi pebba, I hope your situation improves. Whether or not it does is entirely down to you. Instead of getting angry, you might consider that all of your beliefs/attitudes/ decisions have led you to this point, and at this point, you are not happy in your life. Therefore something needs to change. You...
by Tarantula
Sat Jun 02, 2018 2:52 pm
Forum: Girlfriends & Boyfriends - Husbands & Wives
Topic: took a loan behind my back
Replies: 56
Views: 9013

Re: took a loan behind my back

Hi pebba/lena12

I think it would be a good idea for you to speak to a professional therapist or counsellor about all of this, to hopefully get some clarity about what you're going to do next. You need to do this for yourself; not for your husband. For you.
by Tarantula
Wed May 23, 2018 8:33 am
Forum: Girlfriends & Boyfriends - Husbands & Wives
Topic: took a loan behind my back
Replies: 56
Views: 9013

Re: took a loan behind my back

I did answer your question. You asked what I would do if.... and I said, I would leave. Not just because of that one detail, but because of the boat load of reasons and events - the whole picture. Good, that sounds better. Now we're talking! I'm sure your adult children just want you both to be happ...
by Tarantula
Tue May 22, 2018 6:16 pm
Forum: Girlfriends & Boyfriends - Husbands & Wives
Topic: took a loan behind my back
Replies: 56
Views: 9013

Re: took a loan behind my back

Well, it's easy to say, but... if I were you, I would leave him and rebuild my life. It doesn't matter what he said she said they said. It doesn't matter about right and wrong. It doesn't matter what he thinks, what I think, or what anyone thinks. All that matters is that time is slowly ticking by.....
by Tarantula
Tue May 22, 2018 12:43 pm
Forum: Girlfriends & Boyfriends - Husbands & Wives
Topic: took a loan behind my back
Replies: 56
Views: 9013

Re: took a loan behind my back

You need to stop being a victim and take charge of your life.

Seriously, there's no need for more details on how dysfunctional your relationship is. We get it. The question is... what are you going to do about it?
by Tarantula
Tue May 22, 2018 9:23 am
Forum: Girlfriends & Boyfriends - Husbands & Wives
Topic: I messed up. Cant forget it.
Replies: 3
Views: 1158

Re: I messed up. Cant forget it.

Hi I usually can be counted on to go nuts at people who do that sort of shady stuff - I think it's really, really wrong. And even I'm gonna say, I think you are being too hard on yourself. It was four years ago - presumably you're not the same person who would do that sort of thing anymore? Next tim...
by Tarantula
Tue May 15, 2018 6:48 pm
Forum: Girlfriends & Boyfriends - Husbands & Wives
Topic: took a loan behind my back
Replies: 56
Views: 9013

Re: took a loan behind my back

What's wrong with him being on facebook? You cannot police him 24/7. It doesn't matter how much you play detective, if he's gonna cheat, there's not really much you can do about it. So give yourself a break from all the stressful snooping. It's clear to me that this relationship is dead and you need...
by Tarantula
Tue May 08, 2018 2:10 pm
Forum: Girlfriends & Boyfriends - Husbands & Wives
Topic: He’s uncomfortable around me.
Replies: 2
Views: 1069

Re: He’s uncomfortable around me.

Well yeah he's pooping himself thinking you might tell gf that sex happened. He's not only an ex, he's an ex who cheats. You're well shot of this one. Is he more attractive to you now because he has a girlfriend? That's not an accusation, I'm genuinely interested. Like if the fact that he's an ex di...
by Tarantula
Tue May 08, 2018 2:07 pm
Forum: Friends
Topic: Being ghosted
Replies: 17
Views: 2572

Re: Being ghosted

That's right David. The majority always have the right idea. You're so smart to see it despite all the demonising lol. Why it's a wonder you can still walk and talk after I've slandered you so. Do you need a safe space? It's not possible for my independent spirit to spoil our relationship, because m...
by Tarantula
Sat May 05, 2018 8:52 am
Forum: Friends
Topic: Being ghosted
Replies: 17
Views: 2572

Re: Being ghosted

David I just don’t know which part of that to correct first My man is vegan, as I believe any rational person would be if they educated themselves about the impact of animal agriculture and contemplated the victim’s point of view for long enough Germany’s strongest man is vegan, as are many other at...
by Tarantula
Mon Apr 30, 2018 10:02 pm
Forum: Friends
Topic: Being ghosted
Replies: 17
Views: 2572

Re: Being ghosted

Oh David. The irony that you claim distorted reality when the simple reality, and the one that you don’t want to address, is that your pork chop came from a sentient, feeling creature who wanted to live.. Also well done for not really deviating from my expectations one bit regarding what a typical c...
by Tarantula
Mon Apr 30, 2018 10:18 am
Forum: Friends
Topic: Being ghosted
Replies: 17
Views: 2572

Re: Being ghosted

Thank you boulding - it’s so easy to internalise other peoples shady behaviour and wonder ‘did I do something to deserve it?’ I need to stop needing to understand everything, and get better at just accepting it. David - I can’t recall which post you’re referring to but I have quite a few vegan frien...